Don’t groan at me! My rule is that no one can even say the ‘C’ word (not that one!) in my house until after 5th November – Bonfire Night, for those of you who might not have heard of it. See V for Vendetta for a slightly pious retelling of the history.
But when you have kids, keeping the gentle chime of bells or the sparkle of colourful lights out of the home becomes a battle from late July. So, I allow myself to start at least planning my decor from 6th November, and actually putting up decor from the last week of.
Anyway, I do enjoy Christmas, especially now that I’m in charge. Well, I’m second in command to Mr Strange, but the main thing is it’s our house, our rules. I love all the things you would expect to love about Christmas, but I’m curious of those who love an entirely different aspect of it.
Last year, I posed the same question about the Santa Claus fetish, and I maintain that there is something about him. But, what about the holiday itself?
There are certainly some romantic aspects; sleigh rides in the snow, cuddling up with hot chocolate, snowflakes in the air. And I am 100% in for passionate sex atop a fur rug in front of a roaring fire. Of course, in my house it’s more like a quickie atop an old blanket in front of a radiator. I don’t have a mansion, I have an inquisitive and soft-footed 3-year-old.
I was sent an email containing advertising for Christmas themed lingerie and I felt very torn about it. (Not unlike how I expect the lingerie would feel after a short while, heheh.) On the one hand I was like, ‘Ha, who’s getting off on a woman in a red and white furry panty set?’ And on the other hand I was like, ‘…oh. Me.’
What about you, dear readers? Do you ache for a candy-cane between your lips? Do you beg to be the gift for someone to unwrap? Are you eager for a meaty stuffing?
I went too far with that last one. I knew it even as I wrote it.
Strange here. Just had a little inspiration for some thoughts I’d like to share. I don’t often give advice on any platform where I can avoid it. This is for two reasons;
1) What the hell do I know? On a scale of the whole world who access the internet, I am certainly no scholar on any topic. Who am I to tell someone what to do?
2) Who needs the aggro? Most topics these days are considered highly controversial by someone. And I rarely care enough about any given topic to fight a passionate stranger over the web about it. Everyone’s entitled to their opinions, of course, so I tend to just keep mine to myself.
However, I heard something today that made me chuckle, and also made me want to sit someone down for a quick ‘girls-chat.’ But since I don’t know her, I figured I’d just put this out into the world to see if it helps anyone.
So, a friend of mine received a voice message from friend with benefits, (for the sake of the post, we’ll call her Elle) detailing her saucy exploits at a BDSM club the night before. Let me tell you, the stuff she saw and did was hawt! I actually found myself becoming somewhat excited by content of what she was describing.
My friend on the other hand, was a little grossed out. Not because she doesn’t like what was being described, quite the contrary, but something about the recording just set her teeth on edge.
Now, being an erotic writer doesn’t give me claim to many occupational skills, but sexy story telling is definitely one of them. As I considered our different reactions, I started to realise what Elle had done wrong.
You see, Elle had sent this recording to my friend with the intention of getting her excited with her outrageous adventures, but she wanted to seem subtle and cool, as if my friends approval was a bonus but not necessary.
I get that, when you’re flirting with someone, you want them to be interested in you without seeming too bothered by it. The problem was, Elle tried to achieve this by telling the story as if she were doing stand up. For example, ‘So, I was at the club and I look over and Georgia is getting fingered by the barman! Hahaha. I don’t know if the bar will pass their next health inspection after that!’
…You see what I mean?
Now, anyone who has read my work will know I love lacing a little comedy into my stories, but you can’t have a punchline to a sexy scene. All it does is make the whole thing feel awkward and uncomfortable. If someone is cracking jokes at a time like that, it’s usually a good sign that they’re not hot for you. Sorry about it.
So, what I would like to say to Elle is this; if you’re telling a sexy story, then tell the sexy story. Commit to it, go all in. Let your voice become a little husky while you remember the way the barmans shoulders bulged while he thrust his fingers in and out of your friends wet pussy. Tell us how her moans of pleasure made you want to place your lips on hers and taste her gasps, to adsorb some of her ecstasy into you.
The sexiest thing in the world in confidence. If she had told that whole story with honest arousal in her voice, she’d have been getting an invite to dinner and drinks with Mr Strange and I. As it is, I don’t think Elle will be hearing from my friend anytime soon.
So there you have it folks, a few words of wisdom from a humble erotic writer.
As a side note, I’ve just finished the first draft of Beast of Backar 2, (Title still pending), I’m really excited about this ending, I’ve definitely gotten a little wrapped up in the drama of it all, but I think it worked. I’ve loved writing this story, and I’m sometimes surprised by the pleasure I still experience from writing. Every time I think, ‘God that was so fun, I’ll never love writing a story like a did that one!’ I fall in love all over again. It’s a wonderful feeling.
Also, I think I’ve accidentally invented a writing genre. A lot of the ideas I’ve been coming up with seem to include some kind of a murder or crime with the protagonists having to solve it. Is erotic-crime a thing? If not, patent-pending! 😆
Oh, one final thing. I think only the most expert of erotic storytellers can use the word ‘squirt’ and make it sexy. Note, you’ll never see it in any of my stories because I can’t pull it off. Elle used it at least four times. 🙄
So, I’ve finally done it, I finished my sexy horror(ish) story! I say horror-ish because I don’t know if everyone would find it scary, but it’s definitely in that genre.
I did, of course, write a monster-inspired Halloween story last year, but that was a little more subtle, whereas this one is pretty on the nose.
I don’t want to give anything away, but I have to say I’m particularly invested in this one artistically speaking. It’s shorter than my other work, only around 9,000 words, and it was very much a labour of love. Usually, when I write my stories they’re based on things I have at least some experience in, and they’re written for particular audiences that I have a good understanding of.
This is none of those. Mr Strange mentioned the idea, as he’s a huge horror fan, and even suggested a structure. At first, I wasn’t sure, but as I started writing, I found myself just loving the whole story and going completely off the structure I was planning on. Much to Mr Strange’s dismay.
In truth, I’ve always liked this theme, you know, in a sexy way, but it’s not my main fantasy go-to. It’s more like a special-occasion when I’m in that-kind-of-mood-fantasy. Still, it never occurred to me to write it, but as soon as I did, I was enthralled by the idea.
The end result is that I have a story that I love and that was super exciting for me to write, but I have no idea how it will translate for readers. BSDM enthusiasts may be left bewildered, horror fans may be underwhelmed, who knows?
The story also tested my technical skills too. There are a lot of scenes that shift between reality and fantasy, and though I understand it, I’ll be interested to see if the flow from one to other will work for readers.
So, if that fantastic sales-pitch hasn’t left you itching to download my latest work, I don’t know what will! It’s called ‘Unravelled’ and it should be available on Amazon any minute now. Damned delays.
H.P Lovecraft said, ‘I fear my enthusiasm flags when real work is expected of me.’ I feel like he and I may have been kindred spirits…
How are we all keeping? I hope everyone is enjoying the burgeoning Spring as much as I am. Though I’m an Autumn girl at heart, I do enjoy seeing nature start to wake from her slumber as birds are singing and flowers are blooming once again.
…That was all a little poetic for me. Hey-ho, you gotta write what you feel I guess…
Aaaaaaanyway, the really reason I’m writing is to express my excitement about finally finishing my latest short story: The Beast of Backar.
This, like so many of my stories, has started off based on one idea, and changed and evolved more times than I could track as I was writing it. The initial focus was on the immense size of the male-protagonist.
His height people. Come on, minds out of the gutter.
This theme is still prevalent throughout, (with sexy results) but the characters ended up having so many other defining qualities, the story became so different from how I’d planned it.
What you can expect though, is a sparky female lead, an unbelievably hot man and lots of heated tension. (With sexy results!)
It’s the first of three parts but, like my other works, still stands alone as its own erotic story.
I should mention that there are also some twists and turns and an element of mystery and danger. I’m starting to lean into this kind of writing a little. I don’t know why, to be honest, erotica has always been my thing. But I just can’t seem to stop myself at your standard ‘wham-bam-thank-you-mam,’ stories. And I’ve genuinely loved writing this. I can’t wait to see how it progresses!
Anyway, if you’re looking for an erotica story with all these elements, you may find the Beast of Backar is right up your alley. And maybe some other places…
To finish, I’ll leave you with this: Charles Baudelaire said, ‘My heart is lost, the beasts have eaten it.’
Sure Charles, we get ya. The beasts ate my heart too…
I know, I know, it’s a little late for an Easter joke. I can’t help it, I’m just so egg-cited!
For those of you still reading, thank you for seeing past my cheesy humour…
So, today I’m writing because I feel like I’ve overcome some kind of huge writing block this week. I’m still working on the story I mentioned in my last post, and up until yesterday, I was really struggling with certain elements of it.
I found I was able to write the main story okay, but it was lacking some depth. I felt like I was hanging out with these characters but they weren’t being upfront with me about everything I needed to know.
You know when you’re at a party and there’s tension and pointed comments made between two of the guests but you don’t get where they come from? It was a bit like that. I was genuinely starting to worry about how I was going to pull the story together.
I kept going though, hoping that if I stuck with it, played nice and earned the other guests trust, they would confide in me the big secret I was missing. And that’s exactly what happened.
It was a bit of a gamble, because for a while there, I thought I might end up getting to 20,000 words before having to just bin the whole thing. Now, though, I’m genuinely excited about finishing this story with the added information I have.
Has anyone else experienced this with their writing? Sometimes I feel like I’m only half in control of my stories, and that the characters I write have a degree of autonomy… it means that I actually often don’t know exactly what’s going to happen even when I’m writing.
…maybe I’m just a little mad. But shh, don’t tell my characters, I don’t want them to think they can get one over on me!
Anyway, I’ll leave you with this; George Santayana said, ‘Sanity is madness put to good use.’ I wonder how much erotica he read before he came to that conclusion?
So, I’m currently working on a story all about a woman stuck in a cabin with a huge guy. Not just big, but like, beastly if you will.
Now, we all had our princesses as girls, and I was Belle. As a child, I thought I liked talking clocks. As a teen, I realised what I actually liked, was the idea of a big, strong, slightly scary man beast.
I thought that meant that this was just my type, even my husband is very much that ‘alpha male’ body shape; tall, broad shouldered, oddly possessive of certain wings of the house. But as I’ve gotten older, that perception has started to shift a little.
As an adult, I find I’m far more aroused by mental dominance than physical dominance. The fact is, I’m 5ft 3in, not a big girl. Not even a big hobbit, for that matter. It doesn’t take much for a man to overpower me physically. (I’d like to note I have taken a few guys out with a pretty effective right hook, though.) I suppose it’s just not as impressive when a man is all muscle.
But I do consider myself to be an intelligent person, and as I’ve gotten older, I find I’m more and more turned on by mental prowess. This is a little hard to explain, luckily Mr Strange is an impressive specimen in this category too.
There are times when Mr Strange has done little more than talk to me, lowering his tone, captivating me with his piercing gaze… and convinced me that not only do I want him to fuck me, I need it. That’s what really gets me hot. When a man (or woman in my younger days) could use my own arousal against me. Could tempt my kinky side out and make me behave like the submissive slut I am deep down.
So tell me, dear readers, what is it that gets you hot and heavy: brain or brawn? Do you want to be thrown against the wall and taken? Or talked down on to your knees?
And to those of you on the other side, what’s your most effective technique? Do you throw your lover over your shoulder and carry them to bed? Or do you whisper sweet degradation and make them thank you with their undying physical devotion?
Plutarch said, ‘Remember, the mind is not a vessel to be filled, but a fire to be kindled.’ I would argue the same could be said of other areas too.
That’s right people, I’ve released the newest story in the Garden of Eden series; Charmed.
This story focusses on the founder of the GoE club; Evander Fort, and the judgemental journalist, Evelyn Kelley. They are brought together by the exploration of Evander’s world, with steamy results and deadly mysteries!
‘Oooooooooh!’ I hear the canned audience cry.
Honestly, I’ve loved writing all of the stories but this one has been especially close to my heart because it’s the penultimate story and it’s brining the whole series towards its end. I feel like I’m now approaching the last hurrah with a bunch of new and freaky friends who I’ve become very close to.
I do have real friends too. I swear…
It’s also been very poignant for me as Evelyn and I share a love of writing that is born from journalism. That’s right, K M Strange used to write for papers. Big ones, you ask? Well, no. I mean, I got a few bi-lines here and there but…well I write erotic fiction now, what does that tell you about my journalistic career?
It’s also been interesting because most of the characters I write are either already into some kind of kink or at least open to it. Writing a character who is as closed and resistant as Evelyn was a fun change of pace for me.
Which raises a question to you, gentle readers. What’s your perversion and when did you come into it? Were you a fully grown adult before you noticed that the feel of rubber gets you all tingly? Or were you reading vampire novels and enjoying them in ways no normal fifteen year old should, like a certain Strange author we all know and are growing to be very fond of?
While you ponder that, I’ll leave you with a particularly enjoyable quote from a well known teen fave of mine:
‘Put your seatbelt on,’ Bella cried.
Edward laughed darkly and responded, ‘you put your seatbelt on.’
‘For Christ’s sake, Strange. Put your panties back on!’ K M’s husband yelled.
I know, I know, we’re all sad to say goodbye to 2020, forgive me for being so controversial.
Heh, okay, maybe not.
I’m going to join the crowds of people who are very ready to get 2021 started, and I’ve got a lot of ideas that I’m psyched for! Change is cumming people!
My New Years resolution is to purge myself of the toxins in my world; Healthy body, healthy mind, healthy planet. Am I saying ‘No more junk food for me ever again?’ And jogging my way to the supermarket to buy some new gym gear that will only get used three times before being upscaled to my new loungewear?
Yes. But at least I’m trying, bitch!
To be honest, I’m actually in a place where I’m incredibly happy with most things in my life. I find I’m at a stage where instead of trying to make huge changes, I’m more focussed on building on the foundations I’ve made over the years.
Some things definitely have to go, (I still have huge clanking goth boots from my late teens) but otherwise, my plan is to just keep doing better with what I love.
Which brings me, inevitably, to my writing. At the moment, I’m a book and a half away from finishing the Garden of Eden series. I’ve decided to get this all done before I start anything else. I’ve loved writing this series and while I’ll be sad to be done with it, I’ll be happy for my characters who will finally have the answers they’ve been demanding between their many sexual antics!
On the horizon, I’ve got a supernatural series planned, think hotel for sexy-ass monsters meets K M Strange. I’m also in serious debate about opening an Etsy shop under my pen name and selling various night-time delights. I’d be interested in your thoughts on this.
So tell me, dear readers, what are your plans as we skip hopefully into the new year? What do you foresee on your own horizons? Will your plans benefit from some elegantly written porn? You know your girl Strange has got your back.
Until next time, I’d like to leave you with a quote from Mae West that needs no tampering from me, ‘All discarded lovers deserve a second chance, with someone else.’
And like those forgotten lovers, I’m ready to let 2020 fade into the past. 2021 – let’s be having you!
This is a weird time of year for my little family unit; the darkening period between Halloween and Christmas. So, Novemeber I guess. See, Mr Strange loves Halloween, they’re like Jack and Sally, or Tim Burton and his wife, Danny Elfman.
Mr Strange is also obsessed with Christmas, he takes both of these holiday’s very seriously. As do I, it should be noted, I love any excuse to get dressed up, eat sweets and decorate my house. Especially since we now have a two-year-old who matches our excitement ten-fold. I don’t think any woman in history has welled up as much as I at hearing the words, ‘My Mum’s a witch!’
But November tends to be the slump in between. Largely because Mr Strange doesn’t take November 5th as seriously as I do. I love fireworks! And bonfires! And nigthtime shinanegans! This helps bridge the gap between the Witches New Year and the Consumers Binge Party for me quite nicely. It would be impossible to ignore the connection between Bonfire Night and my own creative tastes. Surely, there is no more accurate comparison for an orgasm than literal fireworks? Has the metaphor not been done to death because of it’s very visual similairties to the feeling of copulating? So, I’m currently trying to ressurect 5th November in my household which is quite difficult since the UK has just plummetted into yet another lockdown. Let me know what/if you’re doing anything for the event! We’re watching a lot of fireworks on TV and maybe I’ll let my son play with some matches.
Just kidding. Mr Strange hides the matches from me.
In the meantime, I’ve started to expand my online presence somewhat, I’ve just joined Twitter and already have 5 followers! *Fist pumps the air.* In all seriousness, I’m truly grateful for all of the support I’ve had from my readers so far. Everytime someone follows me, rates my books or leaves me a comment, it’s exactly the driving force I need to keep going. So thanks so much to all of you! You validate me. 😀
Speaking of, I’m about halfway through my new short story, ‘Name Pending.’ It’s an office story with strong D/s themes, (what?!) with an underlying romance and it’s heavily based on the tv sitcom ‘Full House.’
It’s not actually based on ‘The Office’ either by the way. It’s actually based (setting-wise anyway) on my own time working for a recruitment agency. I spent alot of time in London as a teenager too which has helped shape the descriptons. The interactions are all products of my filthy mind, I’m afraid most office’s are woefully boring. Though it should be noted that I was working in a family run firm so, yeah, maybe my options were a little thinner than some. It was my family. I did have sex in an office once, though, on top of a phone shop. I’m pretty sure they based that sitcom on me.
Anyway, I hope your November is as sizzling as mine. Remember, only you can prevent bush fires. Trim regularly.
Someone once said, if you can’t find a book you want to read, write it! I don’t know that they were expecting me to start detailing the sexual adventures of my promiscuous characters, but hey-ho.
So, what does that have to do with anything? I’m so glad you asked! Mr Strange and I are currently debating the cover of…my first actual paper copy book! I know, right?! It’s going to be a collection of my short stories so far plus an extra, bonus, never before published erotic short.
I suppose it might seem like an obvious step for most writers but this has been a very long time coming for me, in ways I didn’t even realise before. I actually started writing erotica when I was about 18. It was terrible, obviously, but I was just having some fun with a genre I enjoyed reading. I dabbled with a few chapters, but inevitably my budding talent ended up falling to the wayside as my journey in to adulthood progressed. In the end, I mostly practised by writing sexy texts to Mr Strange.
It was he who recently decided he’d had enough of watching my invaluable (if somewhat nieche) talent be wasted, and demanded I assault the innocent public with it. I never expected to sell much, I always said if even just one person enjoys my writing, it was worth putting it out there. Leaving myself vulnerable to the opinions of a potentially harsh and unforgiving public. Who actually turned out to be very nice perverts, like me!
And now, just six months later, I’m designing a cover for my first real book. And, my feelings still haven’t changed- if even just one person likes my work enough to purchase it and have it on their shelf, I’ll be so delighted. Obviously that’s not counting the family members who will receive a copy for Christmas. I’m sure Mum will be thrilled.
So, watch this space, readers! The K M Strange Collection is on it’s way to Amazon and Kindle. Treat yourself or your friends (with a good sense of humour).